Sunday, April 29, 2012

In the doghouse

Last weekend, my sister went out of town for some family business. I realize that sounds like we are the Mafia or something, but there was a kerfuffle and someone needed to attend to it. Two someones, as a matter of fact, my dad and Margaret. While she was gone, I spent much of Saturday night and the day Sunday begging and pleading for her dog to come out of the crate, do her business (preferably outside), eat and drink something, and go back in the crate. I was largely unsuccessful. I think the dog had 3 laps at the bowl, one mouthful of kibble, and didn't pee at all. She is, after all, very much a one-woman dog. I was very diligent at this task and made sure that I went over there before the times established by my sister.

She (my sister, not the dog) went out of town this weekend as well, this time for pleasure. And I was again tasked with the challenge of "Lure the dog out of the crate, then outside, then to the food bowls, then back into the crate." (You would think that the dog would recognize the advantages to being able to eat and poop and pee, but not so much.) She left yesterday afternoon.

Tonight at about 12:30, I sat up from my relaxing bed and hollered a bad word.

I forgot completely to go over there last night as well as today.

I write this blog post along the lines of those letters "To be opened in the event of my death." To wit: Margaret did it. Look in the kudzu.

Will it mitigate at all that when I got over there tonight, the dog got out of her crate (after some cajoling), went outside for a while, ate a bite, and is now resting comfortably back in the crate? I'm thinking that the 24 hours she spent cooling her paws did her some good, and she was glad to see me. I won't mention the part about how she disappeared into the dark of the back yard and I was pretty sure for a while that she'd gotten out of the yard, and then this would not be a letter to be opened in the event, because my death would pretty much be assured.

Confession is good for the soul. I am going back to sleep now.

Sunday, April 15, 2012

Facebook Chat Conversation Between Sisters

Since we're a little light on posting this week, I thought I would give you some insight into the sisterly love. Warning: there is some profanity ahead. But I promise, we mean it in the nicest possible way.

Our conversation begins with Margaret's discussion of The Voice, and then she goes on a diatribe when Bryan mention that Cee Lo's arms are disproportional to the rest of his body. We discuss some minor housekeeping duties, and then...well, then it is just mayhem.

Margaret: It's team cee lo vs team blake for now, as far as i'm concerned.

Bryan:raar! i have a cat! Raar!

Margaret: i hate you SO much for that

Bryan: because I'm RIGHT

Margaret: but it is distracting now, and it wasn't until you pointed it out

Bryan: sorry, i was having a hard time with it so i had to share

Margaret: hate

Bryan: rawr

Bryan: bugg [innocent bystander friend of Margaret] agrees with me

Margaret: i AGREE with you, i just wish you hadn't told me!
Margaret: hate
Margaret: hate


Margaret: quit making me laugh..i gotta pee
Margaret: bitch
Margaret: Liz is so sad that Rappetite isn't real. [Rappetite is a very funny website for a restaurant that is fictional. Liz had a much funnier and more reliable blog. You should check both out.]

Bryan: Little Shop of Stories [local bookstore] liked my comment on their post!!!!!

Margaret: you are teh awesome

Bryan: didja read it?

Margaret: the whole thing? not yet
Margaret: your comment, yes

Bryan: story was meh

Margaret: oh yeah, just for you, I am recording Inside the Actors Studio
Margaret: GLEEpers
Margaret: you should read the handmaid's tale
Margaret: it was really good

Bryan: i will when you loan it to me
Bryan: Are you on in the am? [task re: the niece]

Margaret: yes
Margaret: all ams for now

Bryan: who is tomorrow afternoon? [more task re:kids]

Margaret: Wisconsin state senator said "women don't want equal pay."
Margaret: me
Margaret: I am tired of the Voice tonight

Bryan: RAAR

Margaret: hate. bitch
Margaret: did you watch Bones?

Bryan: quit asking me things 2 or 3 times
Bryan: in different places
Bryan: because you are confusing me

Margaret: i was trying to ask in the appropriate place
Margaret: i confused myself first

Bryan: because you are a bitch
Bryan: Raar

Margaret: good night mother fucker.
Margaret: FB just prompted me to tell you that I found you objectionable.

Bryan: as if.
Bryan: what?
Bryan: where?

Margaret: when you answered in the wrong place, i "x-ed" out your comment

Bryan: it's NEVER asked me if I found you objectionable, probably because it's SO FUCKING OBVIOUS.
Bryan: yeah, but it didn't delete it, it just removed it from YOUR sight.
Bryan: I had to delete it.

Margaret: and then it said I could give you feedback as to why i felt you were objectionable
Margaret: but it would take to fucking long to type
Margaret: my fucking fingers would fall off!

Bryan: Good night, cistern.

Margaret: good night!
Margaret: i will leave the book on the counter for you.

Bryan: okay. I need you to email me first pics of the canyon take a picture of it in process [canyon is project for nephew's cub scouts]
Bryan: for teh blog

Margaret: okay, but not right now.
Margaret: objectionable bitch
Margaret: that is your official name now
Margaret: OB
Margaret: sorry it is the name of a tampon, but it is shorter than your official name and thus easier to type.

Bryan: ok. I am posting this conversation to the blog
Bryan: because we need a post
Bryan: and this would work

Margaret: if by "work" you mean make sure everyone knows we should be kept from civilized society.

Tuesday, April 3, 2012

Wherein I get a little crafty..and purple

The problem with being unemployed (well, aside from the obvious) is having time to do things and not having the money to do them.

I have had supplies for a couple of projects on hand and have been working on them the past week or they are.

Recycling 2 Canvases for Bedroom

I definitely consider myself crafty rather than an artist, and fortunately, I'm completely okay with that. While I lived in Houston I had painted canvases directed by a project in The Big Ass Book of Crafts. If you like to DIY but put yourself in the same category as I put myself, this is an awesome book! However, they didn't fit in my new house. So, I covered up the old paintings with white and started over. I first did a wash (or maybe there is a more appropriate artistic term for it) in a pale pinkish gray. I thought I took a picture of that step, but it has disappeared. Then I painted 4th grade style flowers on branches, gave them a few details and painted leaves. Some of my leaves look kinda like bananas, and the turquoise is darker than I had wanted, but I'm happy with them.

Once I hang them and a few other prints, I will show you guys a "bigger picture" idea of what the room looks like.

The Card Catalogue

This is the project that might get some people riled up. Last July I was fortunate to come into possession of a library card catalogue. I posted this photo on FB and asked if it would be total blasphemy to paint it. Of course, asking the question indicates that I had some mixed feelings about painting it. My problem was that I wanted to use it in the kitchen, which is white, white, white with splashes of purple (my favorite color). There are only 3 narrow drawers in the kitchen, and none are wide enough for dividers for utensil storage. I wanted to use the card catalogue in the kitchen for utensils, seasoning envelopes, and whatever other small items I decide should go there. I sat with the wood in the kitchen until this weekend, and just couldn't make it work. So out came the paints...

First, the Cistern (who is going live on a new computer system this week and likely to be scarce) took off all the hardware. I meant to take a photo of all the pieces, but it didn't happen.

Second, I painted the outer cabinet white and the drawers three different shades of purple. I topped it with 3 coats of Minwax **water based** polycrylic. If you don't know about this stuff, you should. This is the second project I have used it on, and water based is one of the most beautiful phrases in the English language.

Here is a photo of the mid-project chaos...

And here is the finished product on the kitchen counter...

One more photograph of the window over the sink (which is to the right of the catalogue). I have the coolest and weirdest curtains in the world in that window. I got them at THIS awesome website.

So, any projects in the works? How did you spend your weekend? Feedback or questions about my funky card catalogue?